Come again

Do you believe in 'carnation?



My mum does, but then she is a Buddhist and has been told to. My mum says that I'm 'carnated from my Nan in Australia. She had a dream when she went with dad to see Grandad when she died. The room was filled with balloons, some of them black and the rest pink. My nan appeared riding a bicycle with a basket full of giant jasmine flowers. Mum asked if she could have some and my Nan said "No, you already have one."



Less than a year later, I was born.



My dad doesn't believe. he says "All religions are bollocks." I wish he was more 'ticulate at times. I know he can be clever with words sometimes. OK, not big words but small words, if arranged well can sound nice.



Anyway, he said this and then tells me that our dog Leo, the one who thinks she's a proper Doberman but isn't, is a carnation of his old friend Allan.



Allan always said that he'd like to come back as a dog. Leo is small, with big sticky out eyes, dad says, "Just like Allan."



Allan loved dogs but said he'd like to come back as one "So's I'd be able to stick my nose up ladies skirts without getting my face slapped."



Dad always laughs when he tells that story. I don't know why, it isn't funny. Anyway, Manchester does that and never gets slapped, I wish he would.



Dad says that if it is true, then he'd like to come back as a tree. "Though knowing my luck, it will be one of those sticky things they plant in the Park for dogs to pee on." probably 'carnations of all his old friends that he shouted at when they were all human beings.



He says that only bad people come back as human beings. And if there was really a God, he'd ban human beings. "They're all rubbish and bugger the world for proper life forms." Like trees I suppose.



When my dad dies, I'm going to find a tree that looks just like him and plant it in mum's garden. I'd put a fence round him so's Jenny, Leo and Tiger can't pee on him and write stories about him on his 'puter, which would, of course be MY 'puter. and he'd get dead famous.



People would come to look at him and think "Wow, I bet he was really good when he was a human being." Then all the birds that will be living in his branches will do a poo on his admirers. And he'll laugh so much, all his leaves will fall off.