A lesson in the kitchen

Sorry I didn't write yesterday but my dad was working all the time and didn't stop. Only to have a wee. Then it was bedtime. I really, really need my own 'puter.
It was quite funny though, watching him work, getting all twiddly and sweary at the keyboard and humbling funny music with his nose. He said they were called 'she santys' and he learned them when he was a sailor. My dad's been many things. He's been a soldier as well and a cowboy and a mafia man. Now all he does is write about it.

I can't wait until I can read and I can see what he's written. I bet they're rubbish though. He never writes about love affairs. That's what I'm going to write about when I grow up.
I know what his password is already, it's 'spittoon'. He doesn't know many words 8 letters or longer. I got it on my fifth try. I don't know why i didn't try it first. He's the only man in the world who uses the word spittoon I think.

Dad says that during the war, here we go again, his Nan used to make rabbit pie. I think that's just a name. You can't make pies from rabbits, they're too small and you'd have to use a whole one to make a pie. OK, cows and buffalos are different, you can cut a big piece off one and he'd not notice but you can't do that with rabbits and I know my dad would never kill anything to make a pie.

He told me this when he was making a beef pie for his tea. He says I can have some when i get my teeth. I have two already but he says I have to have lots. I don't thing you have to have a whole mouthful though, otherwise he wouldn't be able to have beef pie.
He says making the pastry is the best bit. "It doesn't matter how dirty your fingernails are when you make pastry, they always come out clean." I think it was one of his stupid jokes. He forgets how 'pressionable I am. If I wasn't a clever little bugger I'd probably believe everything he says. I expect Manchester believes everything Gary tells him but then Gary isn't clever enough to make pastry and if he was, his fingernails would be dirty and I'm not joking.

SPA IN A JAR

"In the old days," he was telling me how he lived with his Nan because he had lots of brothers and sisters and there wasn't enough room in his dad's house for him as well. The toilet was in the garden and there wasn't a bathroom. Well, it's the same here in Thailand nowadays. For Nans that is. We have a concrete house with lots of bathrooms and toilets, all indoors but my Nan doesn't. She lives in a wood house on big legs with steps to get in and her toilet is in the garden and she doesn't have a bathroom.

It's quite funny to watch her having a bath. She wears a long nanny dress like all the old ladies wear over here in Thailand and washes herself while still wearing it.
she has a big stone jar full of rain water which sits all day long in the sunshine. It sits there all night long as well I suppose but in the moonshine instead. The water is lovely and warm in the evening when she has her bath. She sometimes strips me off and dunks me in the the jar. It's lovely and great fun. I wish we had a stone jar in our garden so's my mum can dunk me every day. I have a pink plastic bath. It's fun too though not as good as Nan's stone jar.

Dad says his nan didn't have a stone jar in her garden. "What's the point, there's no bloody sunshine in England." She had a tin bathe that hung on the outside wall and she'd bring it into the kitchen every Friday and fill it with hot water from the 'Ascot' (Google it yourself). He'd have a bath and then his nan would get in after. "Every Friday night, whether we needed it or not." Another one of his stupid jokes.